Most people who know me at all know that each year I create a list of goals that I wish to accomplish each year. I don’t like to call them resolutions because no on keeps resolutions. One of my favorite musicians has a song where her subject resolves not make a resolution they couldn’t fake. I like that line a lot. It is funny because what people typically resolve to do in the new year is unrealistic and broad. If more people chose specific and realistic goals that they could at least ‘fake’, it would be unbelievable how much people could change their lives over time.
When I was 25 I started to take a hard look at my life and I didn’t like the person who was looking back at me. He was complacent and lazy. He had gotten into a routine and expected his life to continue to improve and grow without having to get out of that routine. Something had to change.
The problem with the actions and choices I was making at that time was they were passive. I was only reacting to the circumstances that I could not control; I was not acting on the things that I could control. One of the few lines in a movie that came out a few years later said it perfectly, ‘I don’t want to survive. I want to live.’ I was only surviving; I was not living – how sad.
I decided I needed to play a more active role in my life. There were too many things that I had not done that I thought I would have done by then. There were too many things that I was continually saying, ‘someday I will do that.’ Thus, I decided that starting in 2005, and continuing each year after that, I would make a list of goals I would accomplish that year. And I have been relatively successful with these goals for three reasons.
First, I keep them simple and try not to limit myself with the goal. The first goal I picked for 2005 was to grow a garden. It is very simple; all I needed to do to be successful with this goal was have a garden in my yard by December 31st. It didn’t matter how big it was or what kind of plants I grew in the garden. All that matters, when it comes to doing something new, is that you start. You can improve upon it in the future.
That is not to say you can’t have bigger goals, it is just important to be realistic. Can it be achieved in a single year? If not, break it up into smaller goals that build on each other. When I turned 30 I wanted to take a trip to Europe, so my goal for the year prior was to save a certain amount of money in my savings account. Then I followed it up with the goal to plan and execute a trip to Europe.
Second, I don’t beat myself up when I don’t reach a goal. Let’s face it; it’s easy to dream too big even when you believe it is a realistic goal. The important thing to remember is that it is not when something is done that is important, but rather that it was done. Too often a person gets down on themselves for failing to achieve a goal in the allotted time and then they give up on that goal altogether.
One year my goal was to read the bible from beginning to end in a single year. I’m not a very fast reader and I often find myself re-reading the same paragraph two or three times to understand it fully . . . I only made it to Jeremiah. But rather than thinking I was stupid for thinking I could read the bible in a year and giving up, I made it my goal to read the rest of it the following year. So I read the bible from cover to cover in two years – still a success in my book.
Third, I don’t let my list of goals for the year limit what I do that year, nor do I let it force my hand. That list was written by the person I am today and would always be the perfect list of goals if life were stationary. But the whole point of these goals is to make sure your life is not stationary (at least it is for me). If six months from now you look at a goal on your list and decide that you just don’t want to do it; it’s okay to take it off the list. Likewise, if an opportunity arises that you did not expect, it’s okay to take advantage of it.
A few years ago the opportunity to purchase my house presented itself. That was not on my list of goals for that year. In fact, that opportunity directly prohibited me from achieving one of the goals that was on my list. Needless to say I took advantage of that opportunity and let go of the original goal.
Finally, the most important thing I do is write them down on a piece of paper. It is no longer a thought in my head, it is real and tangible. I can hold it in my hand and it is always there to remind me of the actions I need to take to achieve those goals. Then at the end of the year, I check them off if I completed them or I adjust it into the following year if I didn’t quite get there. It is a way to hold yourself accountable for your decisions. You can even take it a step further and share your goals with friends and then they will be there to hold you accountable too.
So in the spirit of this last thought, here are my goals for 2012:
- No energy drinks.
- One soda a week
- Lose the 20 pounds I’ve gained since I broke my knee last year
- Write a blog once a week
- Write a Novel in November
This blog is my first of 52 to accomplish the fourth goal. I felt I have not been writing enough since the practical need to write songs has taken a hiatus. And since a blog is only a diary or a journal unless other people read it, I have decided that I will post a link to each blog on my social networks this year so that people will know that it exists. I was thoroughly surprised at the interest in my Honest 30 on facebook, so who knows, someone may actually appreciate these musings.
I have written a few in the past so feel free to check them out and the first blog on here explains the reason for the title of my blog site.
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